Five Minute Friday scribblings, Infertility

When: When God Speaks

Desert Road

By +Jeanne Takenaka @JeanneTakenaka

My Five Minute Friday prompt this week is—WHEN. This largely unedited “rough draft” form of writing stretches this perfectionist, in the best of ways. I write for five minutes on a given topic. If you’re interested in learning more about 5-Minute Fridays, check out our hostess, Kate Motaung’s site. Or, click on the link at the bottom of this post. As you read my simpler Friday posts, I hope you’ll join in the conversation!

WHEN

I’d been staying with my friend’s children for three days when she and her husband came home with their fourth baby.

For three days I’d gotten to put on the mommy hat, and enjoy a few hugs, cleaning, playing with children. Tasting motherhood.

When she came home, those sweet children wanted to see their baby sister. They climbed all over their parents. I sat in my borrowed room, trying not to cry at the pain of infertility coming back to smack me.

When I made the three hour drive home, I shared my joy for my friend and my own pain with the Lord. Hot desert wind blew through the windows of my car.

Baby booties and lambie

I asked the Lord, “When, Lord? When is it my turn to be a mom?”

Much to my surprise, God answered. Not quite audibly, but words spoken to my heart. “I will give you a child.” The emphasis was on the “I”.

In my crazy desire for motherhood, had I made up that six word sentence? It stopped my words cold. I prayed. I pondered. I drove in silence. I shared them with my husband, who believed they were God’s words for me.

God, in his sweetness, spoke them again, a few days later. “I will give you a child.”

My heart about palpitated at the emphasis. There was no “if.” Instead, it was a “when.”

Baby toes 2 copy

God speaks to each us in different ways. Seldom audibly. But when He gives a message, it’s up to us to believe it and act on it.

Those words infused me with hope as I took on a job at our church. And then fifteen months later, resigned when we learned we were going to be parents via adoption.

When God speaks, learn to listen. And more, choose to believe.

What about you? When has God imprinted a message on your heart? What did you do with it?

Visit Kate Motaung’s Five Minute Friday post

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