Five Minute Friday scribblings, Identity

Ten: Ten Things I Wish I’d Known

Ten and daisies copy

After being away on vacation for two weeks, I’m thrilled to be back among the community of Five Minute Friday!

Our Five Minute Friday prompt this week is—TEN. This largely unedited “rough draft” form of writing stretches this perfectionist, in the best of ways. I write for five minutes on a given topic. If you’re interested in learning more about 5-Minute Fridays, check out our hostess, Kate Motaung’s site. Or, click on the link at the bottom of this post. As you read my simpler Friday posts, I hope you’ll join in the conversation!

TEN

Ten Things I Wish I Could Tell My Ten-Year-Old Self:

As a ten-year-old girl, I had much to learn. If I could talk to her now, These are ten things I wood tell her:

  1. Those girls you so want to be like? They’ll still be mean to you when you get older. They may be mean now, and it probably won’t change anytime soon.
  2. Don’t let what others say about your talents define how you do/don’t use them. When God gives you a gift, He wants you to use it. Don’t let others shame you for it.
  3. It’s okay to be tall. Some day you’ll be glad you can reach to the top cupboard.
  4. Take comfort in the fact that having even one good friend is better than having many double-faced friends. True friends are beyond value. Cherish them.
  5. Take risks and don’t worry so  much about getting hurt. Pain often is the thing that spurs growth as a person and in compassion toward others.

    This is a picture of my sisters and me when I was about ten years old. :)
    This is a picture of my sisters and me when I was about ten years old. 🙂
  6. 6. Keep striving to do your best at all you attempt. God tells us to do all that we do our very best to bring Him glory. It’s never a bad thing to attempt greatness, even if you fail.
  7. It’s okay to be the smart girl, and to know the right answers on tests. Don’t try to shrink into invisibility when you’re right.
  8. Stand up for those who are bullied. You know how it feels. Be their defender and be their friend.
  9. Don’t let what others say about you define your perception of yourself. They often speak from their own pain in a n attempt to hurt you the way they’re hurting
  10. Be thankful for parents who love you and love each other enough to work through the hard stuff in life and marriage. It’s a gift.Looking at the ocean

Just in case you’re wondering, I wrote each item on this list as they came to mind, not necessarily in the value of the advice. 🙂

What about you? What life lessons have you learned that have helped you grow into the person you’re meant to be? How do you encourage the children in your life?

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41 thoughts on “Ten: Ten Things I Wish I’d Known”

  1. What a great list! I would say much the same things to my 10-year-old self, but I think that mostly I would tell her, over and over, “Jesus loves you.” I was an anxious, rather withdrawn kid who needed to know that, deep down in my bones.

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  2. Well, OK, the first thing that came to mind as a life lesson – violence doesn’t solve problems except when it does.

    Hmmm…a bit intransigent, that. How about this…second thing that comes to mind…if you find yourself in a fair fight you came unprepared.

    Maybe not the right direction, there…one more try…it’s better to light a single candle than to curse the darkness, but it’s way better to use night optics and suppressors.

    Ah, well.

    That’s why a very close friend said that I should be kept in a box marked “open only in case of war”, I guess.

    The real life lesson is that I am who and what I am, and that I believe that there’s stuff for which it’s worth fighting, to whatever end.

    And woe betide anyone who, even now, harms the innocent in my sight, for I am become death, the shatterer of (their) world. If God calls me out for it, I’m willing to face the judgement.

    Because I believe that choosing life means you’ve got to protect it.

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    1. I can see great applications from what you shared here, Andrew. If we are in a fair fight with the enemy (of our souls) we haven’t asked God to come join us. 🙂

      I’m glad you can embrace who you are—who God created you to be. A man with a warrior’s heart, and a determination to protect and defend the innocent. There is no shame in that. I love the thoughts you added here.

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    1. Yep. When I was in eighth grade, I met up with some girls I’d gone to elementary school with. And they pretended to be nice to me, though they hadn’t been in our school years. And wouldn’t you know, I overheard one of them suggest to the group that they ditch me? Yep, I learned my painful lesson then. And God was faithful to show me what real friendship looks like through genuine friends. Truly a gift.

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  3. Love “It’s Ok to be tall”!! I always struggled with that insecurity…. And ended up marrying someone one inch shorter than me. Life is funny, right? Such a great list – I think I’ll make one today on reflections to my younger self. Good to stop and remember what’s truly important…

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    1. Thanks, Annie. I was one of the tallest girls in my class. I always wished to be shorter. Now, I’m comfortable with my height. My hubby is about the same height I am, so I rarely wear heels, but I’m good with that. 🙂

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  4. Oh I love the matching dresses! I have very similar pictures in my past as well. 🙂 those are good lessons to know and remember even in this stage of life. Thanks for these words! Happy Friday to you!

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    1. My sisters and I were in my aunt’s wedding. I found these dresses at a discount store, and we went with them. 🙂 Funny how most girls have a matching dress picture with someone in their pasts. 🙂 Hope you have a great weekend, Rachel!

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    1. Matching dresses are fun. 🙂 I know what you mean. My ten-year-old son sometimes listens and sometimes doesn’t. I don’t know if my 10-year-old self would have received all of this wisdom back then, but it would have been nice to hear. 🙂

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  5. Jeanne, I love your list, and I’m going to e-mail this post to a young lady I care about. More and more I’m realizing our uniqueness as individuals is our greatest strength. God has special work for each of us to do so that we can bless others. If we’re not being ourselves, then we can’t accomplish these things.
    Blessings ~ Wendy

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    1. Thanks, Wendy. 🙂 I love what you said. our uniqueness as individuals is our greatest strength. Such a great truth, and we’d do well to embrace it. And yes! If we’re not being ourselves, we can’t accomplish all God wants to do through us. Great thoughts to take me into my weekend. 🙂

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  6. Hi Jeanne – My mom made matching dresses for my sisters and me as well (AND she wore a dress out of matching fabric and usually was able to make my dad a matching tie). Those were the days, weren’t they? Your list is perfect – I don’t know anything about being tall (so I just inserted shortest where you wrote tallest – of course I also substituted easier to get into the lower cabinets..), but I loved loved the part about owning your smart and your talent. Yes and yes. I’m glad I visited you back from FMF. Have a blessed weekend. Janet

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    1. Wow, Janet. Your mom must have been an amazing seamstress. How fun to have that memory, and to match as a family. 🙂 Yes, we need to own the gifts and talents God has given us. Thanks so much for visiting back! Have a great weekend.

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  7. Jeanne,
    oh how your smile shines, even at ten. You are so delightful! This was such a great list! Age ten is when the other girls in my class began to “grow up” and I was still very much a child. Encouraging that little girl to just be herself and enjoy that she’s smart and not into boys…yes. My ten year old self was tall but not the tallest…I’m 5’7 now. Hubby is 5’11 like my Dad.
    And so true-the “hurting people hurt people”. That bullying was so hard in grades 6, 7, 8. They had no way to express their pain so they took it out on people who didn’t seem to have any. They perceived strength in us even though they tried to make us look weak.
    So much in here. Bless you, Jeanne! (And welcome back, you were missed!)
    Love,
    Tammy

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    1. Tammy, I’m 5’7 1/2″ now. So we’re close to the same height. My hubby is my height. I dealt with some bullying during those years too. The elementary years were the ones that dug the deepest wounds into my heart though. Thank goodness God is our healer, and that He can give us compassion now for those who try to hurt. I always appreciate your thoughts, Tammy!

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  8. When I was taunted for being too tall, nothing anyone said could make me appreciate my lofty height. Now, yes, it’s nice to be able to reach things, but have you noticed the prettiest clothes don’t come in tall sizes?!
    I still remember marking the wrong answer in first grade. I always got 100% scores, and decided to select “p” instead of “m” for money just to be different. The fallacy of youth!

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    1. I know what you mean, Terri. When we’re in that certain age, anything that makes us stand out is a curse in our thoughts. We can’t always hear truth, can we? You carry your height well. And I’m just at the height where some pretty clothes fit, and others don’t. Sigh. And the fallacy of youth indeed. In fourth grade, I was the only one in class to get a certain answer right, when the teacher asked how I got it right, I told her I didn’t know. But I did. I was just too cowardly to admit I listened in class and remembered that particular fact. Oy. Have a great weekend, my friend!

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  9. Love #2 and #4…they just speak to my heart. I wish I had a #3 problem, but alas my 5’2″ frame had gotten used to looking up. 🙂 Great way to capture ten, Jeanne…ten year olds need these wise words.

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    1. Those are lifelong truths, aren’t they, Tiffany? If it makes you feel better, I always wished I was a few inches shorter, mostly so I would be shorter than the boys. 🙂 Too bad I can’t give you a few of my inches. Have a wonderful weekend, my friend!

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  10. These are wonderful! So many of them (well, definitely not the tall thing as I’m a shorty!) are things I wish I could go back and tell myself at age 10 too. Hope you have a wonderful rest of your day! Your #fmfparty friend and FMF neighbour this week, Valerie

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  11. What a wonderful post. I understand the girls at school. I changed schools 14 times. I always had to start over again. Girls can be so mean. I have always been short and have to use a stool to reach things. LOL I think tall gals are so elegant…just like you…Gloria

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    1. Wow, Gloria. That must have been so difficult to change schools so many times. I think that’s a funny thing about most of us women . . . two things we seem to want to change are our hair and our height. 😉 Thank goodness beauty is found in the inner person, not our height or exterior appearance. 🙂

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  12. I wish I would have known that time would pass this quickly, I would have cherished my younger years more instead of always wishing to be older. Today I take the time to savor each and every moment. My wife and I have made the choice to be a large part of our granddaughters lives. We not only want them to know us and remember us well after we’re gone, we want them to experience our faith. We want them to see how important it is to us. We want to leave that them.

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    1. The time does pass quickly, doesn’t it, Gene? When I was a teen, I yearned to be older. Now, of course, I don’t wish for that. As my boys grow older it seems like the days are passing by so quickly. I’m trying to remember to embrace each moment with them. My parents also try to be a consistent part of my boys’ lives. It’s a blessing for us. And the boys look forward to seeing their grandparents. You are leaving your grand daughters a great gift.

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